In the last post I talked about how difficult it can be to assess our own performance. If you believe this to be true (I do) it means that we may not be able to assess when we are performing well, but we REALLY can’t assess our performance when it is poor. So we might want to wonder about what this means when we are acting in a leadership capacity – can we assess our performance? Are we good leaders, or not so much?
I think it is interesting to consider why some people are not good leaders. Why are they controlling or intimidating? Why do they suppress questions? Why are they autocratic, intimidating, rude or hostile?
I have to confess, that I am not sure. Some people may really enjoy intimidating people. But I do think that in some cases people take on these behaviors for reasons that are more complicated. If you have a sense that being a leader means knowing what to do in the face of uncertainty, but inside you are a little insecure, then when people ask questions it may really bother the leader. That insecurity may manifest as being rude, or hostile. In other cases, an individual may feel that by yelling at someone to “pay attention” yields the result they intend…the person is really paying attention. But the rest of the team is now feeling intimidated and frightened. They are not going to speak up again, even if they have a concern. Yet the leader may feel that they are getting the team to function well.
So what are the behaviors of a good leader?
First – consider being considerate, introducing yourself and invite participation from the team. Tell them that you need to know what they are concerned about and you need them to speak up. Ask strategic open ended questions of the team. Next, set acknowledgment expectations. Ask the team to participate in closed loop communication and read-backs. This way they know what you need and you know that they know that you know what they need (get it 😉?). Consider both briefings and debriefings when appropriate. Finally, ask your team how you are doing. Give them a chance to give constructive criticism and feedback. If necessary, find ways to make that feedback anonymous. Some of the feedback might be hard to hear, but if we cannot assess our own performance, then we need the input of those around us.